This is your Morning Wood Report: I have it.
i literally forgot his name and just started calling him "waffles"
At least you didnt end up topless in a Tina Turner wig singing cabaret tunes
It was like a little tadpole swimming in the big ocean.
i think our first tip to leave should have been when we saw the drinks were coming out of a gas can
I have a very hazy flashback of me making out with a guy in a seashell bra??! Can you confirm or deny
I think we should take up crocheing or stamp collecting....something completely lacking penises
Alright whatever you say... But in the future when you really wish you had a dildo don't come crying to me about it.
when you come home i just want to let you know we are cats now. and we are out of eggs.
It was technically 11... But I go by McDonald's time, if they aren't servin breakfast, it's the afternoon. Therefore I can drink
I actually feel a twinge of sadness recycling all of our handles... I feel like I'm throwing out some great memories or lack of them because we don't remember
I'm floating on a 30mph cloud right now not giving a fuck
wish he had known he had poison ivy on his cock beforehand... Is calamine okay to put on your vag?..
i only got to wear my halloween costume for an half hour before it got taken off.
It's official, I'm not staying in tonight
What caused that decision?
You only live once
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