"what do u think of parents raising kids to be peeping toms" said guy on bus 2 me
Starbucks introducing alcohol. i hear angels singing.
Nicee. Atleast your phone doesn't change pen in to PENISsSSSSSSS like mine does
Single person behavior: I wanted a cookie but was too lazy to make or go buy any, so I let cookie dough ice cream melt and ate all the chunks. Pantsless.
I had a dream about masturbating with toys I can't afford.
My sex life and finances are equally in shambles.
All I know is I was dancing to Shakira in his alley and I think rubbing my junk on his car door.
Fuck underwear. Let's get stoned and eat ravioli.
words I never want to hear dad say again: "Trevor you sexy man you"
Well I woke up naked, with a santa hat on, and a bag of beef jerky next to me. So yeah, I would say it was a pretty successful trolley
Are cops allowed to hit on you if they're in uniform?! Serious question.
I FOUND THE LEGS
I threw up in my backpack last night, but at least it wasn't in the pizza box again
who knew magic tricks and sex would actually go together?
I just watched will sing pure imagination from willy wonka and then blow a banana
We’re leaving where are you
Hold on Toxic just started playing
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