i was so high last night that i actually googled "how to get un high"
if you ask that question again our friendship is over
we usually just have an Easter beer hunt and never end up at church anyways
Chipotle...archenemy of the gay man. Cockblocking me since 1997
So I told her I dislocated my shoulder and she said "well okay. I can either be on top or blow you."
Decisions, decisions.
There are 3 pics of me on my camera, naked, wearing only an apron, scooping ice cream.
Too high to move please buy hi-c and pour it in my mouth in exchange I will marry your first born child
We now know how the night ended in arrest according to the flip camera I did 10 handle pulls and beer bonged a 40. My life choices are getting worse and worse this is your fault.
him being a republican bothers me way more than his coke problem.
Just ran into her dad at the strip club. He bought me a dance. I think i found a winner.
I'm an approx 70% certain someone switched my UV Blue for Windex - just as volatile as you might think.
Best orgasm I ever had! I though we totally connected and I asked him to stay over. He went back to the sigma chi house and returned with his blankie and a 40. please help
I think Jabba the Hut is dying in the stall next to me.
There's no time frame.
For drinking wine out of the bottle and taking nyquil at 9 AM? There probably should be.
I yelled at the cab driver to slow down because my unborn children live here, and pointed to my uterus. I think my message was lost in translation though because he immediately offered me his card...
I ask him how he's going, like life and stuff, and he responds "20-0 pats"
Randomize
