Hey. Be honored that I consider you the genital expert. I know alot of candidates for the position.
Basically as long as the fan is pointed at my vagina i can cool off enough to sleep.
You would be my first round pick for a drinking team
I vaguely remember taking a yard light, holding it up like the statue of liberty, and all of us at the party chanting the national anthem. What a glorious night
Awkwardly walking by your fuck buddy and waving a casual hi in his direction like nothing has happened is probably the best thing in my life
He's carved the words "SLAM STATION" into his headboard...
I mean, the sex was awesome last weekend, but I didn't even imagine I'd reached ovarian rupture status.
Don't be embarrassed its me, I've licked your taint.
Best feeling in the world is getting a random boob pic from a drunk chick at 3 am.
I can hear my family downstairs singing Christmas carols as I masturbate
Was it you I was with where I saw a guy open a beer with his butt?
Just let me suck your dick and be happy. Let me have this.
Well, I currently have zero fuckboys and my vibrator just broke. A fresh start to May.
Sarah just give sum homeless dude a lap dance, took like 2$ worth of change from his cup and was all like, "Biiitch, this aint free"..
She called me at 2am crying because her late night booty call moved out of state
Randomize
