i was looking up hair salons in ithaca for the wedding and one is a hair salon/ sake bar! you can have sake or champagne while you get your hair done!
question, how would one sake-bomb while getting hair done without getting a horrible haircut?
hey can i play with your boom stick tonite? I'll let you shoot the love of jesus in my face.
come over
just heard a swedish guy suck in helium and speak in his accent. top 5 favorite moments. ever.
Today a TA in one of my classes told me he thought I was 35 and going back to school as an adult learner. Alcohol is working me.
I wish you got a notification every time someone masturbated to a Facebook picture of you...
you know you go to a catholic school when you are rollin a joint with matthew 14:1-12
I just saw her shopping list. The only things on it are blackberries, hot fudge and condoms. I almost don't wanna know. Almost.
This is me reassuring you that I'm still alive and making sure you still are.
Is 'too horny to study' a good enough medical excuse to not take a final?
I went to the bathroom, came back, and my friend was sleeping leaning up against the stripper pole.
Woke up in your shoes. Please tell me you woke up in mine
He brought me flowers and then spanked me with a Doctor Who paddle. Pretty good night, as these things go.
Awwwwwww!
How to not get laid: tell him he reminds you of your brother. While having sex. Thanks, vodka.
Happy 4 year arrest-aversary! I promise no thanksgiving has been as eventful as that one haha..
I'm pretty sure my calc professer is on coke. He's just too excited for this to be an 8am class.
Randomize
