Just invented new drinking game watching Hocus Pocus... everytime they say "virgin" wetake a shot and yell out "to j****"
Just saw a maroon grand am stop on my street, the driver opened the door, vomited, and then drove away like nothing happened. Been there, done that.
wait can you just look around please? that was my favorite bra and i've already asked like 3 other guys
If we were unicorns we would fly together. Like in a pack. A pack of flying unicorns.
No, he's fine. He only wanted to know why there were traffic pylons in the living room and how the peanut butter got on the ceiling.
Well if it makes you feel any better I threw up at Roadhouse. And then on the way to the train. And then in a water fountain. And then in a plastic bag on the train.
He just keeps repeating "this isn't my bagel".. i'm worried for his safety
Two words that describe last night: naked and backflips.
Quick question: is it impolite to pause sex to put on my knee brace?
Doing a small happy dance cause my cocaine successfully went through airport security
I mean, we were all drinking, but I'm pretty sure kidnapping came up.
Its like the floor is slow but life is fast?
I see you found the nyquil...
I fucked her with a giant balloon tied to my dick. You tell ME how my night went
I did put on a shirt to start the night, right?
i could have got laid, but instead, i threw up in her hair. you can cross that off the bucket list.
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