i walked into the first stall,, but there was no paper, so i'm in the other one. a little kid is in the one without paper now and is making a lot of noise. curious how this'll turn out for him.
So at what point while he was throwing up on the girl next to him did you think "yeah, im going to hit that"
he made a joke about you fucking his daughter...i think youre golden
I think whatever his name is just puked on the stairs. Just an fyi for the morning. Love you.
just letting you know, you took a hit of the blunt while sleeping. happy birthday
raced the clock twice to day to see if i could get off before my computer died and before i left for my noon bar crawl... win, win
lets go back to having secrets in our friendship
I feel like that needs to be the last time i end a text with "fuck them i love tequila".
Woke up w/ the same freshman as last Saturday but we were sober this time. Is that a relationship?
Mystery solved. Def had ice creme last night. There is a melted half eaten ice creme bar next to the bed. Which had melted onto my pillow. That explains why it was in my hair too. Im a fucking sherlock holmes over here.
Best part of having a window in your office is that you can leave through it when you shit your pants at work.
No. Cease was criminally insane from birthday shots, and not a lot of women want to go home from the bar with a guy who wants to "snuggle but keep it strictly professional".
Got head last night. Had the 3D glasses on the whole time.
I've slept in a different bed every day this week. Operation Ho Ho Ho is a success!
I think this bruise on my arm is actually an impression of your face
He fucked me so hard my nail polish actually chipped. I'm keeping him.
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