Saw a Delta Zeta recruitment poster today. On it, somebody added, "All you need is your daddy's credit card and a lack of self-respect."
Ha i know. My vag can't go too crazy for a boy halfway across the country. It doesn't have that good of range
This situation is one cop call away from being a Lifetime movie.
You should have been there to see the look on her face when I told her that my dog gives better head than her. It was a beautiful symphony of shock, anger, and disbelief.
she's walking down the hall in a thong and one flip flop and one ugg
These fall allergies are really hindering my cocaine habit.
The higher i get, the less gay he looks, and the more i want to make out with him. This is dangerous.
Just found out my 21st birthday is on a Wednesday. The possibilities are cheap, as well as endless.
Not a clue. But I did find out that his penis has a British accent.
It's 3:30pm, I've been out of bed for an hour and spent most of that barfing. We're switching to beer next debate.
my math prof is telling us what to do in a gun fight. i dont want to live in oakland anymore.
My tub is filled with twinkies which would be awesome if they were still wrapped and not floating in a mixture of bath water and what appears to be vomit.
Well you know I have tits so that's half the battle
I woke up this morning to my panties draped around the neck of an empty bottle of bulleit. That is the perfect visual metaphor for my life at this juncture.
The adults are the big ones right?
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