just did a line in a complete hula outfit off a chick in a devil costume. do you think hell will be this good?
Tampa is so boring. I'm dying. I want lots of cleavage at my funeral. If i cant get laid, i want my friends to. I'm that kind of person
fine then we can just have courtesy sex i definetly won't like it
i have a real life question, do ur boyfriends pretend to be vampires ever?
The wedding was scheduled to start 5 min. ago. 20 people here so far, groomsmen in tees and jeans, catering by Costo. NO ONE OUR AGE IS READY FOR MARRIAGE!
I think I'm cybering, it's been a while and its more in depth than it was in 8Th grade.
Said he had been eating pineapple for a week before our 1st date. Not sure if thankful for his consideration or offended by his assumption.
Wasn't a date. In exchange for artichoke dip I received a bj. And sex. It was a transaction.
Please do not make a facebook page for my hickeys.
Sorry blacked out and lost my phone. Judging by the looks of my body I fought a cat and fell into a bush.
Why are you awake at 6am and liking photos from rando Russian chicks on Instagram?
you can only text me tonight if its in drake lyrics. thats the rule
My body hates me. Pretty sure I drank 3 pitches full of coffee last night and took two adderal. I slept and ran a marathon at the same time. You should see my bed.
He met a girl at a stop light and managed to give her his number while driving down the highway.
his mom called during sex and he made me talk to her I think we're getting serious
Randomize
