how do you spell 'special'? like slow?
S P E L L C H E C K
No you dumbass thats not right
Maryland truck stops are full of people with killer mustaches
i dont have any money that hasnt already been designated for cigarettes and birth control
she always made me post sex PB&Js it was like fucking a trashier Martha Stewart
It's one of the reasons i'm here, along with emotional support, physical support if you need it, and power orgasms.
You tried to convince our cab driver that your $2 bill was worth $11.70
Okay, thats embarrasing even by my standards and I've thrown up while wearing a viking hat. just a viking hat.
He kept saying "this is a bad idea" wasn't in his vocabulary. He left at 2 came back at 6 eating frozen waffles and he had a symbol, a moped mirror, and a new MacBook. I'd say he had a good time
was i strangled at any point last night? or was his dick just that long
im sorry but you know it was a good night when you got tasered on the ass and didnt even feel it
Public service announcement: if you would like to continue receiving blow jobs, a 25% increase in fuck-giving will be expected immediately, and you're expected to give an actual flying fuck at least once a week. Brought to you by the ad council.
PUT YOUR FRESHLY SHAVED MEXICAN POON ON THAT BEARD. NOW.
I just watched two grown men tickle-fight. Just glorious. No words.
Walking into class right now and I swear to god I smoked down the substitute teacher we have at a party I went to last week
You came out of your room naked under your open robe with a mouth full of brownie on a stick and grabbed a fistful of fruit loops and shoved them into your already full mouth.
Randomize
