yeah she is the one who tells people i beat girls.. which ironically make me want to punch her in the face
I just saw the girl you left with - Chris Hansen's looking for you
I'm at the bar and they've turned up lady gaga to cover the sound of the fire alarm.
Saying he's good in bed would be like saying Soulja Boy is a good rapper, completely unlogical if you've heard him.
There's a bed on the roof. The window behind it is too small for it to go through. I'm impressed.
czant get you from the arport. sry i found the rum. dan sucks at rumpong jusrt so yo knoqw.
Would it be considered cannibalistic if I wanted to eat off his bacon tattoo?
I just called the on campus pharmacy and asked the pharmacist to tell me how each one of my medications will react with "excess alcohol consumption". And I'm not even ashamed...I've reached a new low.
I had sex with marker all over my face so I can do just about anything.
Your mother liked my album on facebook that's only filled with drunk pictures. I don't know what to feel about this
Is it festive if I masturbate to Santa porn?
yup and then I snapped out of it and realized I was playing beer pong against a 4 year old... and losing
Thought about it. I'm gonna go to work, but I'm gonna tell them I wrestled a bear saying I fell just isn't working.
It was ok until his mom walked in and asked if he turned on the crock-pot...
I am afraid of asking him for his new number so I continue to text the one that's no longer in service.
Randomize
