I think my emotional moodswings have reached a new low. I cried for the entire duration of changing my tampon.
It's pretty bad when the convenient store clerk can tell you that you're earlier than usual for visiting the store.
Revelation of the day. Bulimia is dumb. Anorexia is easier.
You suck.
Your friends ate a hole through an entire loaf of bread
What's the point of being healthy if people still don't want to fuck you?
I feel like tequila heightens the sense of my nipples.
Of course I lose my iPhone but still manage to hold on to the ruler for my dirty teacher costume
Wingman of the year award. I made out with her gay roommate in order for you to get laid. Better have been good.
The gay roommate was probably better than her. Consider yourself lucky.
He's not messing around tonight. 4 fist pumps.
Played never have I ever with high schoolers today. Needless to say they brought up threesomes so I had to make a judgement call and decided to not put my finger down
If the world ends and i have no vodka please just kill me.
He had a cruise ship of a dick and I need to set sail on that ocean again
But he said I was unpatriotic for not having sex with him. What was I suppose to say to that?
There was puke outside of my classroom and lecture was half empty. Damn thirsty thursday is intense
So just spent 30 minutes of my life talking to my cousins friend who told me she buys cocaine from a pizza place by asking for extra Parmesan
Randomize
