I don't know where I am, but its a Goosebumps novel waiting to happen.
guys are only as good as the porn they watch
It's called penis withdraw. Or alcoholism. I get them confused these days.
yeah, that's what i said too. right before i tackled that street sign.
im celebrating the fact lent is over and i can give blow jobs again.
I just found what appears to be a tooth in my purse...anybody missing one?
i don't know what happened by from the looks of her lipstick I'd say she was skull fucked by a rhino
I would not be 19 again if you paid me. Guess who found naked pictures of themselves? Fuck cocaine
I might have been fine if i had magic teleportation powers and could have skipped the car ride between bar and home
Oh man I'm using the bubble wrap that wraped my new vibrator to wrap my dads fathers day gift
They were so big her bra clasped in the front. Didn't even know those existed.
I already left my house once this summer. Maybe we could do something in October.
I just felt emotion and I'm not okay with it
I just want to be like "i dont know you but ive seen your penis & i like it"
Dude I'm fucking tired of freshman, there are god damn teeth marks on my dick again
Randomize
