My new storm is the chrons
The only reason I needed a new one is bc I threw up on my other one(248): And since Verizon doesn't have a throw up test, I was eligible for a new one
One of her kids, Dakota I think, got stuck in a ceiling fan and she had a fit, thats when she found the penis hat.
It feels like Jesus smacked me in the face with the new testament for drinking so much last night
He's playing farmville on his phone while puking over the toilet..
I won the karaoke contest at the bar last night, when they called my name i was doing blow off the toilet seat, i thought they caught me, i didnt even know there wasa contest
Her thighs are so strong. I thought my head was gonna get crushed when I was eating her out
I woke up in your car in the McDonalds parking lot. What the hell happened to 'no man left behind'?
370HSSV 0773H read that upside down
what are you doing with your life
Get drunk. Masturbate to his picture. Fall asleep. Repeat. Fuck summer.
hey dude my crackhead idol just taught me a great way to tie shoes
even my drug dealer wished me a happy birthday before my mother did.
Ultimate fat girl moment: I promised him my mouth for the night if he bought me a funnel cake..
If by fun you mean, did I meet her cousin for the.first time and bang him, then yes it was a productive evening.
How bad is it that I can say that this isn't the first time a married man, who is in the military, has tried to make me his mistress?
She's not allowed to do acid anymore... she started crying because she thought she was an eagle.
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