Me too ba-by. I wanna bite your ear lobes they are so fat.
I'm convinced her vagina is similar to chernobyl, but I want to visit it for the novelty value anyway.
Also I am about to cut a ringtone from "Sex Machine" so James Brown can tell me to "get up, get on up" in the morning
I once woke up to the scream from 'get up offa that thing' and smacked my head on my desk
cab driver says "I saw your friend who opens her legs. she went home with two guys." pretty sure he was talking about you
next time a party gets busted lets get a group photo first.
you called me and cried until i agreed to record a rap about our lives with you
Shit, I may have left some acid in your bathroom last night. Has he been in there lately.
I sang Jenna happy bday in the middle of throw up hurls
i feel like i got punched in the cervix. he's a little different in bed than i thought he would be..
Watching elf, eating a tub of ice cream, and coming to terms with the fact that I haven't had sex in 5 months. Happy fucking holidays.
It was only funny because some guy across the street was getting his mail and he just stopped and watched me throw up everywhere
Well, I can mark "throwing up in a daycare bathroom due to a hangover" off my bucket list.
I only blacked out one night of three if that isn't fucking personal growth idk what is
I woke up in a bunk bed beside two Brazilians dude you have no idea how happy I was
My concern for you and peanut butter is the reason I am still awake.
Randomize