I feel kinda awkward using the Sesame Street themed Google to search for hot young pussy...
it's like his penis is God's way of saying "sorry about his face"
No, I am not setting up my roomba to clean up puke.
He explained how that handle got into our fridge. I think i'm going to stick with my original assumption that the vodka gods want me to drink more vodka.
I've been at work 30 min broke a paper towel holder a chair set a box on fire and fell down twice. Hungover Brian just reached a new level
Is it possible to just pretend that everything we did after grilling up your goldfish didn't happen?
I can feel my moral fiber fraying.
What's sign language for "you may not be the father?" Kinda important right now.
She literally got down on all fours and I swear did a 360 degrees head rotation exorcist barf...and then moaned IT WAS THE TACO BEEEELLLLLL
so no, not her best night
Let me know when ur ready so I can throw up one last time then brush my teeth
OH MY GOD I JUST WANT TO GO HOME AND FART ALL NIGHT.
Tell him to dress up like Shaggy and kidnap him then bring him to me. We can pretend. Imaagination.
You just jumped of the couch and yelled "hidden tiger crouching dragon!" That's the answer to how you broke your finger.
What the matter? A girl can't play some Super Mario without being accused of being high?
Google imaged your anal issues. Seems fuckable still.
Randomize
