never try to heat up a hot pocket in the dryer if ur microwave breaks...bad idea.
did we hook up?
no, because you kept repeating "itty bitty titties" when i took off my shirt
Cause i'm hanging over the toilet bowl and thinking about your ball in my mouth is not helping
It's a system.. i get to hook up with them and you get to play words with friends with them afterwards.
its been so long even thinking about having a dick inside me makes me sore
But I was triple fisting doubles, that's bound to be a good time. Might have a broken collarbone though.
You know it's a good party when even the dealers were too fucked up. Just found and counted 140 E pills I found in a bag in the couch. Just paid for weed this month.
may or may not have figured out a way to make my mom a drug mule to bring me ecstasy...
Want to run by the liquor store later? Tequila Youn should really be in attendance at Party Mountain. No one else could be our spirit animal.
He got a new tattoo in prison. It's actually a good tattoo, making it that much harder for me to hold out until he's off house arrest.
Remember when we used to smoke out of an apple at the playground? Those were some precious moments
I had sex in the tube at that same playground once. That park is full of memories.
Also, my guy said they would be around. And i clarified that when I asked him for mushrooms he didn't hear "a mushroom or two" but rather understood I meant "all the mushrooms you can find between now and 4th of July."
If she didn't have scissors in her hand I would have motor boated the fuck out of her when she was done cutting my hair.
he's fucking insane. he's worse than me. is that even possible? I'm only with him because his dick is huge. I need Jesus.
If you survived your 72 hour masturbation marathon put on some pants and come over. My mom dropped off a lasagna.
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