also, you're talking to the girl for whom "deformed baby arm" wasn't quite a dealbreaker.
I swear that men would be more efficient if they had a semen gauge on their penises
Just realized how many men I've had sex with for the first time in St. Patty's Day past. Currently sending "HAPPY SEXIVERSARY" texts...
I've had more sex in the two weeks since we broke up than I ever had in any two weeks we were together.
I only wish the guy being lead around by his cock at the drag show was the weirdest part of my night.
You started a dance party so that you could steal their vodka and shouted "sailors out!"
I think he just made me trade sex for my cat.
I would feel bad that's he's locked out naked, but the world should really see that.
Huh interesting. Well thats too bad. Did he catch on?
I doubt it. After sex he sat there naked until the episode of fresh prince (which had JUST started) was over.
You tried to pay for our cab with the 2 dollars you got from selling your natty ice outside the strip club.
That BJ in the bathroom was definitely worth the $20 cover.
You are the only person I know who has a fierce hatred for a five year old. Not even five year olds in general, yours is very specific
I got really adventurous too. Like. Balls in the mouth adventurous.
at what point last night did i get this tattoo of an anchor made of dicks?
around eleven
The report specifies "melted cheese food" as the cause of the burns. Your pride, like your cock, isn't getting out of this without heavy damage.
Randomize
