ok i said sorry. what else do you want?
100 blowjobs
Can one do a walk of shame from one's own hotel? Considering I just barfed in a planter down town in from of a bunch of business men in suits on my way to a work breakfast on a Wednesday morning, I am gonna just go with yes.
I lost of the blow last night. Found it later in my bag labeled Fairy Dust.
You were pissed we didn't change the movie to Eurotrip so you kept singing "Scotty Doesn't Know" over and over until you passed out.
there was naked duck duck goose
how does that even get suggested?!
after naked leap frog.... it wasn't that big of a deal
she's sniffed three people's necks on the bus to see who the good smell was coming from...
she's gonna get diseases
Wanna skype?
Can your lips gently and pleasantly suck on my balls via skype? If not, then no.
I hate that you live in a gated community. I feel your guard judges me every time I go to your house at 3 am an leave at 5am
Wait. Wine + Crossbow..?
You told me that they girl who was giving you a handjob under the table looked a little like your sister
I feel like that's something that he should've asked me over dinner..... instead of with his hand down my pants? maybe not
Maybe the problem is guy has to ask his wife if he can go out to lunch with his girlfriend for an hour...
I don't know what's worse. The fact that my biological mother is an unwitting bigamist, or the fact that my half sister is trying to seduce my girlfriend.
It's like if you wanna bond just do a ropes course or have group sex you don't have to be weird about it
She was a cheerleader in college and President of her sorority and now she’s a sales rep for a pharmaceutical corporation. “High maintenance hot” doesn’t even begin to explain it
But dear lord is it worth it
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