I think he may have called me a bar rat, jokingly. I said i was but in a non-trashy way.
Sandwiches eeeeeeverywhere.
The chick I went home with last night had a happy trail
My roommate just did the walk of shame in last nights corset back to our room to find her dad there. THATS why i go to school out of state.
just ate frosted cheerios in coffee with some marshmellows. the college diet begins
This from the guy I found eating salad out of a pot lid in his boxers on his porch last night.
Besides. I seriously had a dream that George W Bush came over and slapped some tabs down on my kitchen counter and said "let's get juiced.". It was a sign to not get too fucked up
Im eating these cheese filled pretzels. So good. Theres jizz dripping out places i didnt even know i had.
I just need like a magic vacuum to suck everything out of me and then an IV to put good stuff back in
I haven't taken a solid shit in four weeks. Do you know what started four weeks ago? Alcohol and dining hall food. Fucking college.
Ok thats it i need a list. Full names, nicknames, in which frats, with a photo, of all the guys youve hooked up with because three of the same guys is ridiculous
I didn't want to shower, so I shaved my legs in the pool . That drunk .
Just woke up with only a scarf and my uggs on. i hate partying naked in winter.
So, random question. How much should you tip a Lyft driver when you realized you've fucked his sister? Asking for a friend.
Fuck you bitch. You're married. You got a live-in dick at home for your needs. I still gotta surf this shitty town's bars for cock
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