there was a guy here who managed to get his head stuck in a fishbowl. no, I don't fuckin know how
So my professor just changed my Final to 7:45am on May 6th. Shouldn't a Spanish professor understand the implications of Cinco de Mayo???
Its midnight, he's burning water on the stove and keeps yelling at me and telling me not to burn myself.
its so hard to text. the buttons are tickling my fingers
I feel like I wont be making enough money to support my frivilous lifestyle of beer and mcdonalds
she cried into her fur with two handfuls of money- she was the physical manifestation of white girl problems
After this weekend, it looks come this holiday season I'll be walking in a winter abortionland.
Given everything we have talked about, is it wrong to ask you to be faithful to me, despite still dating him?
we are blowing up condoms and making balloons and we’re drunk on the floor. You could have come to school here
If you make 120 dollars and I walk instd of drive and don't eat or smoke this week we can pay rent
You went home with a man in a loincloth
I just watched him leave in half a loincloth. Don't you just love Halloween???
Whenever we go out my brain flips on autopilot, straight to blackout.
We tried the hang n bang, remember? You ruined it by crying and telling me you loved me while blowing me.
She told me "I think I'm going to puke tonight" a few seconds later she said smiling"I can't wait!"
He just ate a tooth whitening strip...
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