I have discovered something important. The trick to making food taste better is not always 'more hot sauce'.
just found a sign outside my brothers door "not going to church, don't even try" and he is covered is vomit in his bed.
he's werid. hell kiss me after i go down on him but he wont kiss me after i eat anything with mustard.
I woke up this morning peeing out bubbles . I smell like baby wash . What the hell happened .
I just wanted to share with you that my life has come to naked arts and crafts, to fix my flask, with a rum and coke in my hand... Good luck on your exam
Confidence is key. All I had to tell him is I'm drinking a bottle of wine and eating chocolate today to celebrate that I love myself. That's how you get a Valentine, my friend.
Smoked a joint with my old camp counselor and now we're going to a strip club. There is a god.
you can only text me tonight if its in drake lyrics. thats the rule
I just wanted to be nice to your dick and you are rhyming at me.
He's my favorite late night booty call. He lives next to a Wendy's.
2016 is coming through for me, I'm renaming it the year of great dick
I never want to even look at fireball again because it reminds me of the night I died and then lived to tell the tale of how I died.
You know you were really drunk last night when you woke up and had someone else's jacket with their car keys and medical marijuana that you wore home from the bar and no sign of your actual jacket.
I think i got my first booty call. it was like she came to my house. sex. leave.
Congratulations. Welcome to the wonderful world of quick dirty secret sexy time.
thanks... i think. haha
yeah true but how easily can you rip a scrotum
Randomize
