Latenightwjoannablackberrywontletmespaceitknowsimdrunk
I'm actually pretty neutral about a lot of things. I'm like Switzerland with a penis.
It was like fucking a house. Down the chimney. That deep and empty.
I just watched a video of Justin Bieber kissing a girl..... the sad thing is that I actually got upset.
i would bitch about being this hungover, but honestly im just happy to be alive after this weekend
Those were the days I had no morals... Dark times.
Shall we take a trip back?
I think I met somebody from your birthday this past weekend. He said I held a push up contest outside the bar and told them I would make out with the winner. He said he won..
Please come and kill me with a brick you dont even have to be nice about it just smash myfucking skull in this is the worst hangover ive had for at least a week
I'm sorry I didn't respond. I had a shit day. However, I just masturbated to Adele's Rolling In the Deep while crying. It was oddly therapeutic.
We fired a shoe out of a medieval cannon. I know not where we got either one.
WAIT MOM THIS DOESNT NEED TO BE A FAMILY EVENT OK AARON DOESNT NEED TO BE AROUND FOR NIPPLEGATE 2014
Her handjob consisted of slapping me in the balls. I am never hooking up with her ever again ever.
Sitting across the table from one of my high school teachers who hasn't seen me since I was about 16 drinking a beer wearing a leotard
I felt like a slutty ass cruella devil driving your old car, And I got in a fight with your wipers
don't think less of me for this, but i'm pretty sure he did a line off my boob last night.
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