so I'm in athletic shorts, a suit jacket and I'm still drunk at 6:30am at the last leg of relay for life
My gynecologist inadvertently complimented your penis.
He sent me a picture of his dick with a cowboy hat on it.
The next time i black out make sure i remove the ping pong balls from my weave. Especially before my first day of classes.
i like feelif swiord YOU ARE A GOD
I have a boner and a quesadilla why aren't you here
bro, your right, i shouldn't feel embarrassed about taking shots from a penis-shaped ice sculpture
That's right. I did.
You are the saddest 25 year old gay man I've ever had the displeasure of knowing.
also, am i correct in guessing that advertising the size of my hypothetical penis is a turnoff to him?
and Katie got too high with the tow truck driver and wants to go home
party devolved into two exes battling with Cal's tiki torches, and the lawn being set on fire kinda sorta and then we all hula'ed... hulaed?
At least I know that however bad my life gets and how low I can feel I'll never feel shitting in a red robin parking lot low
I think he's like Cher he's going to live forever but not as scary looking
I came so hard I literally levitated off the top of his dick. Gravity was no match for that orgasm!
I woke up at 2 AM to find them in my living room with a radio flyer wagon full of milk glass plates and a Holstein cow. How am I going to explain this to my landlord!?!
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