i am a beautiful darrk chocolate womann
honey you're def caucasian
i am a beautiful white cholcllate woman.... Z
yo i just woke up i feel so weird, and the absolut is still fill, so is the 30, what the fuck did we drink last night man? And will you please come out of the bathroom.
Bro... we didn't even hang out last night??
I got so many pubes stuck in her braces that when she yanked her head, I cried out like that one girl you "accidentally" rear-ended last week. Bald spots are battle scars.
Fuck the gym. I just shaved m'cooch and my pants now fit looser.... Dont judge me.
Exactly. Because my vagina can't be consoled with words. It requires a thicker form of communication
I'm still drunk. it's summer. I just need a hot dog and an aspirin.
I woke up to a 3rd person picture of my own dick sent from a 1-800 number..
Looks like a took a video of myself beating off and passed out last night. I'm classy.
I could be busy drinking my face off and getting red white and bruised per usual
Man, coughing on your period is like the biggest gamble a girl can make.
I'm going to need a penis the size of a bat
Soo are you just gonna poop in my bathtub and not talk to me anymore...?
what are you getting to drink for new years?
well seeing as how i just got diagnosed with a uti, whatever we can mix with cranberry juice
I am convinced you could sleep through the apocalypse and only wake up because youre hungry & want Dominoes
Granted, I did not plan to spend ANY hour of the last day of 2020 sober.
Randomize
