I'd do that. But we would need storm trooper helmets.
Also do the "tongue the pee-hole" thing.
im sitting at a bagel shop wearing a princess crown hungover and have a sweater that is not mine.
The look your mother gives you when she sees you masterbating on web cam is unlike any I've seen before, but this is a case where, I would say, ignorance is bliss.
I just claimed my unemployment in Vegas. This seems wrong.
I told him i wanted to be exclusively cheating with him
Oh my god! She wrote the word ''hi'' in HAIR on the shower wall. What the fuck?!
if that blanket by the dog bowl was your dog's "bed" then i apologize to bailey for having sex on it
Every once in a while you'd chuckle to yourself, and when I asked you what's so funny u replied "sometimes my toes tickle eachother"
I've already reverted to sweat pants. And lonely drinking.
I had to have the guy I went out with last night come pick me up from the hotel the next morning after I ditched him for a firefighter..don't even talk to me about a walk of shame
I just watch that 70s show all day and blaze whenever they do. It's nice being part of the circle
Mom, I'm really sorry you saw my naked ex-boyfriend in the living room this morning. I can explain....but I'd rather just stick with this apology and be done with it
Fucking adderall I just talked at the security guard for 90 minutes
I gave him a hand job in the parking lot... now he thinks we're meant for each other...
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