you'd be confused too if you woke up to pictures of a ghostbuster doing body shots off you.
Is it illegal to masterbate in an airport?
It's spring break, I'm sure it's ok.
He let me keep his flannel as a "good job" for the great head I gave him.
his grandma walked in on us. twice. and he was truly fucking surprised when i put my pants back on.
She found 60 bucks at the strip club. Its probabably been in a vagina but really most money probably has
i got shots of sambuca dumped on my head last night. my bag still smells like licorice. making me nauseous.
it is a nice little reminder of the bruins dominance. if Vancouver had won, it would somehow smell of maple syrup.
The only funny part about this situation was this morning when they rounded up all the drunks in the ER, piled us into a minivan, then dropped us all off at our houses.
Russians do not operate on the same level as the rest of us. hoping I wake up tomorrow
googling pictures of Lindsey Lohan so that I know what to wear to court is definitely a low point in my life
I swear some just paged for more cock rings over the intercom.
Let's never forget the time I met you while you were running down the street naked and in handcuffs.
People try and tell me I never learn me lesson, well that's a bunch of crap. I asked for Monday off for Superbowl recovery based on my experience last year.
Hey so I got my period
Thank god I wasn't ready to deal with sober you for 9 months
I woke up with a giant paw print on the side of my face, my jaw hurts, and I have no idea how any of this happened.
Soooo, hypothetically, how long would roommates have to sleep together before its considered dating...
Randomize
