used foursquare to find where i am. please come get me. this is the scariest bedroom ever.
I woke up from my nap, looked out my window, and saw about bout 6 people get tasered in less than 20 seconds.....could someone please tell me what's going on.
The underwear in the garbage is clean. Just wipe the pizza sauce off
Hickey on my chest, threw out my elbow and now walking out my shame.
Youre getting too old for this
Watching the tv in the reflection of my phone cause I'm too hungover to roll over.... Yes it is 4 PM...
That one life defining moment when you catch yourself pouring whisky into your hot chocolate at 4 am, whilst crying and talking to your dog.
why does he always try to puke into shot glasses
How soon is too soon to enter the slutty phase of this breakup?
I am still STD free so as far as I am concerned I never went to panama.
Id fuck him but only at his house and he had to stay im bed till i left. He only works upper body. It just creeps me out how tiny his legs are
Is the mullet a good, great, or horrible idea before we leave for college
I'm batshit crazy. I don't know how you guys keep forgetting that
Can we talk about how i drunkenly changed the timezone on my phone last night and just showed up to work an hour early
Just got home from work. I'm going to change into sweats for a while before I have to wear normal pants to the party like I promised.
scotch tastings during the week is a baaad idea. i woke up w no pants but wearing my winter coat
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