Would it be quicker to bike the freeway home?
idk how it happened. she made a very smooth transition from crying to blowing me
dude uncooked spaghetti noodles dipped in thousand island dressing is better than it sounds
I had sex on an exercise ball. The inevitable has occurred.
New major. Tourism Management. I dont know what it is but it sounds like something all the stupid slutty failed business management majors do.
Sometimes one must go to great lengths and make great sacrifices to get drunk. I willingly accept the challenge.
do you actually have a paper bowl full of broken glass and ecstasy or was that just a dream?
... Already stepped in vomit and got a dirty look from a fat in a neck brace
And I'm not sure if that's how you pluralize penis. Never planned on needing to know that in my life.
I ate goldfish off your shoulder, I think we had bigger issues
The orgasm outlasted the Charlie horse. Pros and cons.
I'm going to get like 25 drinks at their wedding and just leave them sitting around or give them to hobos.
I would have dumped her already but between the 4 hr bjs and our shared love of enjoying thirsty Thursday naked while watching basketball I'd say its the best shot at love ill ever have
Dude, that was like bongs ago.
Just had a reminder come up that just said "Ham"
Randomize
