Kroger has a sale on economy packs of some ridic brand of condom with a smiley devil heart on it $4.99 for 24
Sounds like a baby waitign to happen
Is this going to be a big send off or a somber occasion? Just need to know if I should start drinking on the train or not.
My bra smells like weed because there's weed in my bra
I gave my ex the dutch oven last night. How was your night?
I'm just sayin. Is it sad that I spent my last dollar on a hamburger just to get a paper bag to huff out of?
white shorts are a girls way of saying "im ready to fuck cuz its not my time of month"
she uses eco-friendly sex toys. she is the literal definition of a hippie.
my life has come down to walking through campus and wondering if every guy is the random i made out with saturday
Smoked a joint and chugged some pepto. Feeling a lil better... Not sure which is working..... Gonna keep doing both.....
I've just never had a dinner guest strut in, go directly to my bathroom, vomit.. then come out demanding whiskey and food.
im destined to be single forever. i hope its okay if your kids come and hang out with my cats.
Come over, we're having a tea party. And by a tea party I mean we're drinking whiskey from tea cups.
We tried to make ramen in a glass bowl on the stove. They called facilities to pick the glass out of the door
Just in case you blacked out, we had sex, you came in me, we need plan B, we fell off your top bunk, broke your roommates chair, i still like you, but i'm in pain and am going to bed
Two grav bong hits and a shower later and I'm ready for company
It's like you say things that speak to my soul on a deep personal level
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