Omg alex and i were cooking weiners on a campfire and a bear came and i am waayyy too high for this
Well we can cross off dogs, dating sites, and real life as ways to help you meet a chick.
I got a lap dance until she said they wipe of the poles between each dance to clear the "std slime", i couldnt even masterbate at home it was a horrible military monday
Pre-St Patricks Day Log: Threw up across a 14ft radius, this is why the irish dont drink tequila
i just walked in on him masterbating..to a picture of me. that definitely has to be true love.
and then he proceeded to take what he called, a whip cream shower.
Let's turn this shoulder dislocation into a positive. Come to the hospital, bring some beers, let's party.
Oh you know, watching its always sunny and petting his cat and NOT fucking. I'm starting my whorefree 2012 resolution early.
Also I walked home in over mitts \nLet's take a minute to really laugh about that
You told me to keep you from drinking, but we both know I'm not that kind of friend.
Now when you said you'd never sleep with me, did you really mean never on a Monday or never without handcuffs or a blindfold or never on a airplane or never without lots of booze? Cus never is a pretty strong word.
Update - might be back in your neighbor's good graces. She liked the framed photo I gave her of me on the tractor with my business out.
On another note- any interest in going to a gay bar to hit on 19yr olds?
Is it normal, that tacos make me horny?
...I just melted into my bed. I am one with the bed. I am 600 thread count.
Randomize