Jason just peed on the potty all by himself!!
"omg awesome!, you do realize we aren't together anymore"
ya ever know whats down there. always send some fingers in first to scout the situation. fingers are not used for pleasure. they're used for covert missions.
I've had that scene from "Parenthood" where Rick Moranis' character is singing "Close To You" to his wife in classroom, stuck in my head all morning.
I guess my mind is just wondering whatever happened to Rick Mornais.
I had to go to the bank to confirm purchases made on 10/31/09 because they were signed as Lady Gaga
i think the whole apartment complex could hear you beating off last night
So the answer to your question is yes, I was masturbating on the roof of my building.
I feel wrong giving my mom a cash gift full of dirty stripper money.
I'm just saying, margarita tuesday would turn anyone gay.
Thank god crabs can't live on your head. Thank god.
He called some chick he used to fuck for cash to get food delivered to cheer me up
We hooked up with 2 friends last night as always and she stole their fucking cocaine and I just had to drive to their house and make her give it back to him hahshshahahah only me
She had her pubic hair down there shaved into the superman s............. Best one night stand ever.
We can't do acid Disneyworld.
It started getting weird when you decided to scold my vagina.
Let's make a rule now, to not smoke weed out of our trumpets. After tonight.
Randomize
