my new favorite insult= "thundercunt"
ID DO HER
SHE HAS LUMPS OF DEODORANT IN HER ARMPIT, I THINK ONE FELL IN YOUR DRINK
But why is there no point in liking him? Does he have herpes? Is he married? Is he gay? Did he get his penis chopped off in a freak accident? If the answer is no to all of the above, then he is fair game
Every time a song comes on I get sad if glee has not a cover of it
We just threw our carpet out of our room. Via fourth floor window style.
I just canoed to the bar. I am a skilled drunk paddler.
You know me. Don't need roses, just dick and food.
My arms are hairy. And so Is my left leg. Just my left leg, the right is smooth.
I don't think you understand. I woke up under the car. At 3 am. In the club parking lot.
Before I go in, is 'I just got a root canal 2 hours ago' a good excuse to show up drunk to yoga class with a 6 pack? Because if not I think I need to go home.
almost just sent your mom a dick pic. almost.
I've slapped too many boys and done too many naked laps for it only to be 10:30pm
Please don't give away my fajitas
Sorry I bailed on you yesterday. I was propositioned.
And you don't turn down margaritas and oral.
The bartender remember my drink from last sat. I think we just became drocals...drunk. locals.
Randomize
