And now I'm afraid that I'm a pornographic eater.
Totally smoking with fifteen year olds.
They asked me to help them shop for lingerie.
Tell them everything looks awful, makes their ass look fat, etc. You'll wreck their self esteem and likely both have sex with you to make themselves feel better.
You're the most understanding sister I could ever ask for.
Somewhere along the night we ended up at a food lion giving jello shots to high school girls.
He makes this seasoned whore feel like a novice. I've met the one.
we found him. outside on the balcony, sitting on a bucket, with his pants off, swearing he was'nt taking a dump
He's minimum effort, but maximum fuck.
They're showing aladdin at the bar my birthday is complete
I'm not judging you. Just know that you could be Queen of The World. Instead you're 5:28 p.m ponging. I hope you're at least winning
Girl. There is the cutest old gay here. He's approximately 100 years old and kind as shit.
Again??? Now we can't ever fucking go there again STOP PEEING IN FOYERS
Did we do anything stupid last night besides hook up with our ex girlfriends?
He just asked me to be his girlfriend while having sex on his parents kitchen counter
I'm prostituting myself for tickets to Disney World. There's a contradiction there.
Why can't he just dump me? This is like a baby seal clubbing the hunter
Randomize
