That's why you don't touch shit after fingering somebone
my boyfriend just said he'd go down on me if I gave him my password to facebook
There really should be an "avoid ghetto" option on my GPS.
she took out her dip, threw up, and put it back in. it was like a scene from Nick and Nora's trip to the trailer park.
on of the only things i remember was the security guard told me i was too drunk for laser tag.
How can he have such a manly penis and baby hands?!
Stripperoke is exactly what it sounds...
There's a person in my phone named motor boat. I love making new friends.
A little light bondage fun never hurt anybody (erotic asphyxiation excluded). Car batteries attached to reproductive organs have.
rigging a system to keep my jello shots cold in class. important election day work.
first time i ever mailed panties back to a fuck buddy. what better of a way to say its over
I woke up in my tom cruise outfit with my house key tied to my thong....
I'm allotting you four buildings to piss on tonight. Choose wisely.
I'm surronded by jorts. You're probably too drunk to care. I'm gonna cry now. Love you.
I know you're here! I can hear your phoneeeee. Wake up and do illegal things with me.
Randomize
