so how was last night?
got high and had our usual talk about the definition of cole slaw. then tried to call the ramen noodle company and convince them why my face should be on thier packages.
He asked if I was on the pill, apparently I just downed my glass of beer and winked at him...
Registered sex offender is the model in class today.... There are too many things wrong with him getting naked in front of a lot of college students.
hot buttered vodka was not a success. on any level.
I will pre answer that I did not see it the fun way. He was peeing outside.
You burned the hair off your arms. Again.
It grows back stronger each time.
He offered to let her do a line of coke off his hard-on. She said she'd had that hard-on and it would be a bump, not a line. Everyone laughed. That's why he left.
So that answers the first question but not the second: how the fuck am I getting home?
My apartment is also really close to an alcohol rehab in case I get out of hand
if you guys find pieces of my teeth don't throw them out please
My neighbors are white girl rapping to Hamilton again...
I have no idea what to do with myself since we graduated.
I've just been napping and sexting all day.
why is there a shopping cart in my back seat? and a dick drawn on the side of my car?
Dude it's 6 am and you just invited me to a hotel with a shit ton of coke. Best morning ever
You would be successful and sober without me. you can't turn your bakon me now
Please wake up and help me figure out how I woke up on the floor with my head under the couch
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