It sucks..Now I'm depressed because appearence wise, she's the closest to my favorite pornstar I'll ever get..
I don't think blacking out in class is a good idea. But I'm game
I just made a steamroller out of a christmas ornament. I feel so festive.
i drank out of a bidet.
winnie the pooh came out of nowhere and offered me a burrito...it was a fucking amazing burrito.
I am going to dream of scrotums tonight, I just know it.
We'll find out our level of friendship after tonight. You'll be helping me move a body. My body.
I think I'm going to contact pbr and see if they'll sponsor our dreams
I mean, the sex was awesome last weekend, but I didn't even imagine I'd reached ovarian rupture status.
Your mother may get texts again about women putting dog food up their vaginas and asking for it to be licked.
He legit watched "Cops" the entire time he was fingering me.
We stole a Christmas tree from the student center and then decorated it with everything we stole from parties... All I have to say is Feliz Navidad!
After a beer I realize now I may have shared too much about my obsession with ghosts with my therapist this morning.
Its like people have to train for months before they try and drink with us and survive...
the twins are trying to figure out which one is the one doing body shots off a janitor in this picture
Randomize