So today I found out that our school is known as the herpes school
my boob sweat smells like rotting zombie flesh
is this your pickup line?
I think I'm cybering, it's been a while and its more in depth than it was in 8Th grade.
How many 'remember name' entries is it inappropriate to have in one's cell phone?
I walked up to a girl in a bar, and all I was capable of doing was taking my beer and bumping it up to hers. While doing so, all I could say was "Bud Light". She walked away.
Shit, I may have left some acid in your bathroom last night. Has he been in there lately.
please promise me that no matter what happens you will keep me away from the children
I wrote my name on his balls in sharpie. In the homosexual world that's like a diamond ring. Shits permanent.
Just put your hair in a bun. We're going out to drink, not to impress people.
I want to go out and have good clean fun.
Ok, but that does not include Bud Light Platinum and your vagina.
Then I'll go home and you two can do whatever two same sex heterosexual soul mates do
I don't know which I need first...a shower or a confessional.
Is it too far to say to someone "you're useless for everything besides sex"
have you ever tried to puke in an automatic flushing toilet? impossible
Optimism doesn't exist before 2pm nor do any other emotions.
Randomize
