come over anyways, right now, right this second
it can be a super quick quicky, then you can go back to studying
wow, that sounds SO fun, please stop enticing me with premature ejaculation
my mother and i just seriously had a convorsation about why you cant Google "Refurbished Dildos"
too bad they don't have a 'people you may be able to do' thing on facebook. it would save me a lot of fucking time.
i paused nhl 10 while i jerked off and it was like a crowd was cheering me on
Im so hungover that my 6 year old cousine made me aspirine and coffee out of playdoh...
Chipotle...archenemy of the gay man. Cockblocking me since 1997
Theres a fat guy wearing a speedo. Someone just got puked on, and didnt even react. Whats happening?
I'm in Burlington Coat Factory. This place'd be great if you were on E. There're so many textures...
I'm kinda hoping that if I rub the right object, a genie will come out
you realize you insisted on them having a dance off to korean music to determine who takes you home?
It's not your birthday unless mom picks you up at the bar
This is my last chance to be the first person to fall off this roof.
Well my parents know I get medical Cannabis they saw me on the news at the dispensary
I am talking to a naked lesbian about robots. I think this means I win life.
I feel like I should send her I'm sorry I've been fucking your boyfriend flowers.
Also I’m on 3%. Just Incase.. I miss you and I love you and you’re my everything and I’m getting drunk.
Randomize
