You would DIE at the bar we're at right now. All indian/asian med students, I swear
Asian doctor ratio. So hot. I would've gone into heat
Please stop trying to convince people that you're retarded and I suck your dick in the same conversation.
Wow anytime a scalper has i need tix written on the back of a franzia box thats a trusted seller
woke up this morning with a fat chick but she went downstairs and made pancakes without saying a word.
Ps, did you know if you google "drunk jenga", you're the first image that shows up?
I tried...failed..now im naked on the futon since clothes are hard.
I was just too high to be in rapids man. I just screamed for the entire time I was jostling about.
Some guy just drank alcohol from me shoe..I think he's had enough..
I wonder how he feels knowing that he's the one who turned me gay
I got slapped by a drag queen and bitten on the arm by either a random girl or a weird mouth shaped dog. Tough to tell without seeing the teeth
btw my ex came by last night and saw the pregnancy test intructions. awkwarrrrd.......
Really, who hasn't had sex on your bed?
ME.
And two different second-graders said my make up was pretty. It's left over from last night bc I woke up 5 min before I was supposed to leave.
His abs are so defined he looks like a human xylophone.
The people above me are fucking to Miley Cyrus
Randomize
