Revenge fucks should not count towards the total number. They're justified.
Pretty sure that this text will cost me like $5 but just wanted you to know that I just smoked a bowl of kush, about to walk around shopping for hookers and i get 3 credit hours for this study abroad .... have fun studying for finals.
and that's why he's hiding in the taco suit
He doesn't need a wingman, he needs a miracle
this will be a night to untag.
There's so much relief when you realize you wake up in your own bed
someone wrote on his wall: "congrats on your engagement"
I think you may want to look into that...
I don't know if it was his cologne or his Jesus hair, but he was much more fuckable than last time I saw him.
Now that I think about it, it may have been the 6 pitchers of beer.
you start one little fire by the lake and the police want to talk to you all night...
Stay positive! You think people like sad vaginas? NO! You'll get some!
never planned on seeing last weekend's one night stand again, much less be on the same plane as him..
No biggie, just trying to keep my liver function in the green
We just finished having sex and as soon as we get out of bed he yells "trust fall" and runs me over
How is it that on the one day I'm just moving my car at 6:30 I get the walk of shame looks but when I come home at 9 am in a torn dress holding heels old ladies smile at me?
ugh, my whole family is going ape shit over my sister's pregnancy blog. I dont get it? Anyone can get knocked up! I had rebound sex with a new york ranger last night, now that is something to fucking blog about.
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