One of my students just wrote an essay on how ninjas, like drug addicts, must realize they need help before they can get better...I gave it an A+
We just all danced like dinosaurs in the center of the dance floor.
i dont care if i had to wear a dress to fuck her, she was super hot and i stand by my decision
I like to think of it as a lesbian feast.
He called me on my way to the bathroom and told me he wanted to hear me pee my beers out... That. Drunk.
I was super naked---except I kept my shoes on, because I'm a lady, and I was bent over a bar.
It's a little sad/awesome that I scored coke within 60 seconds of walking in the bar.
The student becomes the teacher.
And that is why we dont do tequila shooters at 1 in the afternoon. Because you go home with a beast like that
American Eric just peed on us from the second floor. Hes now very confused as to why his "toilet is yelling." Send help.
NEW HOUSE RULE! If you make it in a chicks cleavage it's 3 cups and bra off.
BP at your house from now on.
please let it be arousing that I used numbers to figure out how well I'd give you head
At one point we were both in the bathroom and i was taking a shit while holding your hair as you puked in the sink. Friendship.
Updates: Made out with a teletubby last night in the middle of the street #lifegoals
What are you bringing to class tomorrow?
sorrow
The whole country is going to hell in a handbasket but I got a grade A fucking and don't particularly care.
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