I want to be a jewelry store heckler. "Hey man, is she really worth it"
i just google imaged poop.
She's the rare girl who loses weight and gets uglier.
You were telling me to give my phone mouth to mouth so it wouldn't die.. Should i be worried for you?
My ex best friend's ex fuck buddy is visiting. There was no other option but day drinking.
Given my current decline of critical thinking and capacity for speech it's probably best u call the cops
He was like an artic tracker. Walked ten paces from the tree, then 15 paces from the mailbox, dug down in the snow, and pulled up the case of beer he hid from his parents out there. It tasted like ice cold success.
you really need to stop getting laid in my dreams more than i do.
I'm so drunk. Liken realign drink
Like really drunk?
Or did you enjoy repositioning your drink?
So I should just walk in, look him in the eye and say, "I just came to fuck your brother, nice to meet you" and just walk to your room.
Now go get drunk with your fam and get back into ur christmas groove. No time for gonnorhea
We discussed how many times we've passed out during sex. The answers may shock you.
Like I don't care that he's a drug dealer, but I have a problem with his inefficient and ineffective business model.
Listen, you eat the donut. I eat you out. Everybody wins.
if you and your penis don't hurry up, I'm getting drunk without you.
Randomize
