just took a sink shower in Arbys bathroom
Your vagain smells worse when im sober.
sorry, worng number
He smothers me through text. I can't even image what he'd be like in person.
You guys better make it up to the cabin in time for mud wrestling on Saturday. I'm not kidding. You know when I joke, and now is not one of those times.
Im in his room watching him sleep. Im going to try and jerk off and not get caught by the nurse.
Here's a tip. Don't party with someone that needs sexual attention. Drinking and sexual attention don't mesh well in the morning. Especially over a bowl of Cheerios.
He's sitting in his room on Facebook with nothing but a pillow covering his crotch. I can't help you at the moment.
We should drive around in your Jeep on snow days and get stoned while we help random strangers stuck in the snow. So much good karma.
Hey my vagina is like a company. Everyone has an equal opportunity....
They're magnificent. It's like god made her last but hadn't fulfilled his boob quota.
Yea it's also hard to turn down a man asking you out with a chicken sandwich.
Fyi - we're going to be eating those sandwiches in bed when you get home.
His eyefucking isn't even normal eyefucking; it's eye anal.
so he's a sleeptalker.
yeah??
"Mitochondria is the powerhouse of the cell" right in my ear. 2 am.
So. My mom went grocery shopping for me while I was at work & brought the food here. Cool bc my dildo was laying on the counter. Forgot I left it out. I am sure she saw. Im mortified.
Randomize
