haha it's okay then, bc he only killed a canadian, they're not real people
i effin hate jeff goldbloom.
but i totally would still bang him
I am not speculating about which disney princesses do and do not have gag reflexes
Yea...but the guy who is beating me has a ponytail. So actually, I'm the winner here.
a guy tried paying for lapdances with cds, who uses those anymore?
there's a guy looking for his pants in my room, is he yours?
this is not the time for floating mt dew and shots of tequila.
1) I'm a decent drunk texter. 2) My world is spinning. 3) I'll give you a dollar and a hug for a glass of water. 4) I love you. 5) Example: your penatrive ways are overwhelming my alternative lyfestyle. 6) That is all.
7) Noodle arms: engage
The example was me just using big words while hammered. You're welcome. Ambidextrious. I spelled it right.
don't care how drunk i am. my dick was like "nope, not doing it, you can't make me and i was like oh yes i can"
Yes but funny for a 45 year old hell bent on reliving her college days by giving body shots and hand jobs. Not necessarily in that order
He was an asshole the entire night and then tried to touch my dick in a Michaels craft store.
Sooooo, no second date?
I don't think I'll get invited back. I drunkenly told her that her kids would be perfect for a pro-abortion campaign.
It's gonna be me and some oreos tonight. Basically like sex
answer honestly do you think i can make a bloody mary with ketchup????
You ever have a fart follow you around?
Randomize
