grinding to god bless the USA? really?
shut up
I shampoo & condition my pubes, sometimes i wish my face was closer so i could rub against it cause it feels like plush
If your still trying to figure out the moment I stopped caring; it was the point in which you said "I really wasn't sure whose baby it was"
As it would turn out, "jesusssssss" is not the password to enter Faith Chapel's wifi network.
I realized we pick a president more often than I get a blowjob
I don't know how I'm gonna do that tomorrow. I feel like I was hit by the motorhome. LOL I WAS.
constantly striving to make life awkward and more complicated, one drunk bone at a time.
I wish your snatch was here
If my snatch could sprout wings I'd fly to you
We'll just play it by vagina and see where it leads us
It's a 'fuck poison control' kind of night.
This will always be remembered as the Christmas I had 15 Russians sing christmas carols to me at 130am alone in a gas station while I was stoned on pot brownies
sexting foreigners is the best. they respond with silly things like "love that tits"
I got a hand job after work. Remember those? From the 90s...
So, my eyeglasses somehow ended up in my nightstand drawer and they're covered in lube.
Life lesson... stop having side pieces that know each other...ffs.
Randomize
