butt plug
anus plug
rubbish cock?
yes
you suck at this game today
What would a frattoo be? Maybe like the Chinese symbol for Keystone Light.
her vagina probably looks like a grenade went off in a deli
Someone sent me a drink from across the bar. It was water.
Guess which guy you've blown just made me sandwich at subway?
come on down! you are the next contestant on the night is drunk!
I feel like I just walked the hall of shame thru the marriott. Everyone stared.
I think it was the shoes and limping. Not the sex. I could b wrong.
Something's wrong. My throat is definitely not in it's normal spot. Way too low.
They don't allow McDonald's in the ER. Go figure
Is it too early to start a donation jar for my 4th of july hospital bills?
Almost screamed "GO FISH MOTHER FUCKER" at the girl I nanny today. Drunken card games shouldn't bleed into my sober life.
Yeah. I was about to call 911 but I ended up breaking the door frame off then ran and puked all the way home.
He somehow pantsed the bouncer and tipped him over before cartwheeling and skipping away? Help me find him.
WHAT GOOD IS APPRECIATING IF NOBODY'S NAKED
I woke up next to my bosses toilet.i wish you had just left me in the neighbors yard.
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