I know right? mind you this is the same woman who told me when I was 12 that oral sex just meant talking dirty
While she was crying about breaking up, he looked at her through his fork and said "of course she's upset, she's in jail." Having sex with him tonight.
is it bad that i have made the decision to never travel to vienna simply because of that transvestite that won the bachelor?
dont start drinking without me
Day 5 without masturbation. Fat chicks are back on the table
whatever. i don't care. i just want to be drunk wrapped in an american flag.
Whatever. I'll just fuck him now and deal with the clingyness later.
He's currently surrounded by roughly 23 girls he fucked and never called. He may not make it out of here. Bar of doom? Or of redemption?
threw up on my 7.30 AM placement test. Never again
Honestly I think at this point I purposefully schedule nothing on Sundays anymore so I can spend all day wallowing in my shame.
110% paid for our cab with a lap dance
Alright, text me when you get close. I've got a mustache and I'm ready to get my day drunk on.
He held the beaver pelt from the fireplace over my crotch and asked his friend "she look familiar now?", he then remembered my name.
I kept on yelling at him to get his shit together as he was puking
Drunk on wine at my parents house watching "RugRats In Paris". Comeatmeadulthood.
He passed out while I was riding him but stayed hard long enough for me to orgasm. He definitely earned the blow job I’m going to wake him up with in the morning!
Randomize
