the party we crashed was not a party. the party we crashed was jens grandads funeral.
There is still throw up in my sink from before break. God I missed this place
So fucked up. Can't tell if I'm starving or about to puke. Playing it safe and eating froot loops. Tasty in, colorful out.
Just signed my boyfriend up on a dating website so I could officially have a reason to leave him for my hot neighbor.
Everyone was hooking up and I was just by myself rolling around in the grass at one point ... Which I am allergic to.
Please come quick there are people in suits here judging me
You were so drunk you coat checked your shoe... Not even both of them. Just one shoe.
Dude. I've been high for so many hours now that I'm just accepting this as my new reality.
God if that man would just have sex with me every time I got mad life would be so much easier...
I had to bail out of the tour de Franzia because I have class Saturday morning. Grad school is ruining my life
Did my roommate wake up in your girlfriend's apartment in drag again?
Overheard a drunk girl talk about how when she's drunk she believes in more than one God
REMEBER. We are young, horny, and poor. If someone wants to give us alcohol... TAKE. IT.
Philosophical question for you: is it better to go into work slightly drunk or slightly coked out?
If God is analyzing my life right now extremely proud or dissapointed but either way I took wednesday night drinkin to new levels
Randomize
