i don't remember her name, but i don't need it unless we decide to hook up again. but even then, i can get away with not knowing it for a while. it's not like we have actual conversations.
you said you get the best orgasms off Pez dispensers. how do you think he felt????
I was so high i started crying when i saw how much puppychow was there.
Maybe you should go over there and lead him on and reach down his pants like he's about to get some and yank his balls.
That's the best idea I've heard all day.
Oh damn. God have mercy on everything w a dick in a ten mile radius.
Doing Jager Bombs on a Sunday morning is justified...How else is my team going to win?
I know this is really fun but I don't wanna glow anymore
Last time we talked he was trying to sext me but he was including pictures of fruit
He wouldn't let me put a red handprint on his face or scream to him everytime he walked away.
Why did you want to do any of that?
If someones last name is Wilson, you are obligated to pretend that you are Tom Hanks and they are a Volleyball and quote the movie when you speak to them.
Tell them to carpool to pride, have a 3way, and if one says 'no thanks' just tell em it's not gay if it happened in a 3way!
At IHOP. It feels weird and sad that your cleavage isn't here for me to try to toss paper wads into.
I can't believe i just offerred a guy a burrito and head, and got turned down. Officially celibate now.
How much do souls cost? I feel like I need one if those.
Why can't you just come over, fuck me, then leave so i can get stoned and watch law and order?
Whatever. I have his dick. Haha how many girls can say they have a dildo replica of a guy they were seeing
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